If I were
to mention one lesson I had tried real hard to understand, that would be, the
lesson to let something go.
I lived a
happy childhood life and my kind of happiness was defined so simple that you
might have heard the tweet by @disneywords saying “We can’t buy happiness, but
we can buy Disney DVDs and that’s kinda the same” more or less. I remember
being addicted to cartoons and animes, watching one single movie more than five
times and that’s why I vividly remember some old Disney movies, whereas now it’s
so hard to barely remember the plot of a movie I watched, say, last month. How
Cinderella found her prince charming, how your happiness is waiting after you
went into a big trouble; I was impressed by the saying “And they live happily
ever after” and the tagline “Just believe and everything’s okay.”
Truth is,
after living for quite some times, life is not that simple. Nothing lasts
forever; whoever says otherwise, they are obviously lying. As time goes by you
will see that life is a constant change. One day may be a moment of bliss, yet
tomorrow may be a trap of hell. The very person you hold dear to your heart
today may end up breaking you down tomorrow. There are so many aspects in one’s
life you cannot expect them to go well at once. And life is definitely full of
choices, indeed; the point is not which one is the right choice, but how you do
what you choose properly. It’s hard to deny that your environment and the people
around you, aside from your heart and your logic, also affect your choices.
There are
many, many choices I have made until now. And not to say, there would always be
critics and disagreements for the choices I have made. There is this one thing I
have quietly decided and lately some have criticized it so badly that I’m
getting tired of listening to them. It is not that I didn’t give it a thought
before making a decision and why I’m still holding on to it. Perhaps I need to
admit that there is a selfish part of mine I cannot explain nor understand also
took part in it. At first I only took it lightly just like Sunday morning
breeze, but nowadays it feels like a terror, although still I’m trying my best
not to pay attention to much to it.
As for the
choice I have made, I didn’t make it halfway. I have prepared myself for the
worst case possible; if I am to let it go, believe me, I am more than ready. I don’t
want to regret it nor sulk in the misery which may come afterwards. I will take
them as happy memories and treasure them instead. I am not praying this to
happen, though. I still want to believe and cherish it as much as I can. What I
am doing now is convincing myself why I am taking this road and that there is
no such thing as returning. Let’s just enjoy it for a while.
If I were to
think of every little detail, I might not be able to smile today. Thus, I just
need to think of happy things and be grateful for whatever happened and will
happen. You cannot expect something to stay the same, can you? And there is
just no meaning to pull it so hard when it’s not meant to be. That’s when I
realize, every encounter must end up with good bye. And that’s where you need
to let it all go. There is only two good options : forget it for it’s too
painful to bear, or, save it in your heart as a precious memory.
